A week or so ago I found a copy of Mothering your Nursing Toddler at the thrift store. I never really expect to find good books there, but always look on the off-chance I'll find a gem.
This was just what the doctor ordered. I love this child dearly, but I'll be the first to confess that toddlerhood is not, at all, in any stretch of the imagination, my strength. I fatigue of the silly games, the battle of wills, and the irrationality of it all. It's especially hard now that I'm a few years out of practice.
It's specifically dealing with this age (15-18 months?) which makes Kevin and me really rethink any notion of having a fourth child. Newborns are easy-peasy. Night waking is fine. Explosive poops are just part of the game. But the endless climbing on the table, shouting for hand washing, throwing himself backward in furious protest when it's time to put on his coat: I could do without.
I'm especially fatigued because of our nursing relationship. I know the moment I go downstairs after sneaking in these few moments of early-morning productive time that he'll see me and immediately cry "tap tap!" (His words for nursing, because I've taught him to "tap tap" my chest rather than pull down my shirt.) He follows me, cries for me, pulls on my, screams for me. After a long night of the same types of behavior, it's tiresome.
Thus, the lucky thrift store find. It's a good reminder of the investment philosophy of parenting: give a lot at the beginning, get a lot in the end. And like all people, I love to read material which bolsters my philosophy, so this book makes this endless night-waking and nursing seem normal.
Maybe it is. My next "project" is to look into anthropological studies of nursing, including the nursing and reproductive patterns of great apes. This, however, involves poking into academic journals, so perhaps I'll wait until I have a good night's sleep to begin. Estimated start date: 2015.
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